Melissa Oholendt | Minnesota Wedding & Lifestyle Photography

I had my MOST FAVORITE DAY EVER on Saturday. Seriously. The best. I became shamelessly addicted to the Bachelorette with these two.  I was convinced the world was coming to an end during Sunday evening’s rain, hail, lightening, thunderstorm. I took photos of my shoes. I met Gina for a quick 30 minute tea date that turned into a 3 hour marathon of updates, laughter and tears. I went…shopping. I accompanied Matt to his barbershop of choice and realized just how uncool I actually am. I spent an amazing (lazy) Memorial Day morning cuddling on the couch with the dog and my husband. I need more days like that. I Chipotle’d. My new Everlane tote arrived and I haven’t put it down since. I edited photos while drinking wine & watching Mean Girls. And somehow my MOST FAVORITE DAY EVER on Saturday was better than that. (Hard to believe, right?) Also. The dog. Notice a large percentage of the photos are of Gunnar? I’m not sure if he got cuter or if I ran out of material to Instagram but goodness… #dogaholic

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A. Hand over my heart, swear on the Bible answer?

I knew I couldn’t continue living life as I had been living it while working a full-time corporate position, trying to be some semblance of a Godly wife, and spending any and all of my spare time (and hours I never knew actually existed) serving my clients and running a business. I wasn’t giving 100% to any single area of my life and there was no pretending that I was excelling at ANYTHING, let alone the things I truly loved. I missed my husband. I cried every single night. I never saw my friends. I wasn’t eating well. I was under-slept and wildly emotional. I saved any social graces I could still muster for client meetings, sessions and weddings and left my family, co-workers and anyone who happened to be on my warpath to deal with the growing disaster that I was becoming. That is the honest answer. I hit my max. I wasn’t myself anymore. And something had to go.

Woofta. Now that is honesty.

Your answer may be (and goodness, for your sake, I hope it is) different than mine. But there’s a likelihood that my answer touches on something you have hidden away deep in the recesses of your heart. Something you have buried because it’s too painful to acknowledge out loud. I’m with you. I am. Those months between where I felt I was ready to make the leap to my last day at my corporate job were some of the hardest months of my life. The knowledge that while things are going to happen that are out of your control, you are 100% in control of your attitude & emotional responses does not make life or handling the emotions any easier.

This was my situation. And yours? Yours is likely to be different but one thing is true; while I talk a lot about emotions, this is not a decision that you can (or should) make based purely on how you do or don’t feel. (As it turns out, you can’t pay your mortgage with emotions.) If you are thinking about taking that jump into making photography (or, really, any self-owned business) your only source of income, here are three things that I believe imperative to preparing for success.

I won’t go much into this one but if you are thinking about quitting your day job and have not yet incorporated your business or have business insurance to cover your equipment and liability? That is a pretty massive necessity. Make sure you have a solid brand & client experience in place to attract your ideal client. If you have not already, run the numbers; make sure you know how much it costs you to serve your clients. Create a budget. (Yes, you have to.) Hire a great accountant who can help you figure out how the ever changing tax laws affect your business. This isn’t rocket science but if your goal is to make your business your full-time venture you need to be dead serious about making sure your company is in a place to handle that transition.

Emotionally before you make the leap you feel like a big, giant ball of INEEDTOBEFULLTIMERIGHTTHISMINUTE and ICAN’TWAITANYLONGERTODOTHIS but what happens the first Monday you wake up without an obligation to be anywhere but right in front of your computer? Well, let me tell you. You end up spending a full 1/2 day visiting six different area Best Buy & Targets looking for High School Musical 1, 2 AND 3 because you know they will make the perfect background noise to editing and by the time you get lunch (because you are out, duh) and get home it’s nearly 2pm and you’ve spent $200 ($40 of which is in Essie nail polish colors) and you are no closer to finishing the edits for the wedding, 3 engagement sessions and 2 lifestyle sessions in your queue.

Whoopsie.

I won’t lie to you; my dream-like views of “being my own boss” were so vastly different from the reality that it was hard to reconcile. I envisioned waking up, enjoying a leisurely cup of coffee, walking the dog, taking the time to clean the house, fitting in a solid 6-8 hours of working and then having dinner cooked (or on it’s way to being cooked) by the time Matt came home. HAH. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Little did I realize that fitting all of that in meant a 4am wake-up call, a caffeine IV and a time-space continuum miracle.

There are these little emotional daggers that no one really mentions (or it’s possible they did and I just was too wrapped up in my own ball of I can’t do this one minute longer stress to hear them). Like how necessary boundaries are. Especially when you are on your own. Just because you have an extra 10 hours a day doesn’t mean that you won’t end up working until 2am most nights unless you actively create boundaries for yourself. And that a pile of laundry or dishes in the sink (or your dog) can be enough of a distraction to hinder your work. And that yes, yes you can really can waste an entire day refreshing your Facebook, Twitter and Instagram feeds while simultaneously online shopping at J.Crew.

The truth is that working for yourself can also be incredibly lonely. And yes, that is an understatement for this extreme extrovert. After a full work day of not speaking to one other human being, I would literally attack Matt the minute he walked in the door. Hi. How was your day? What did you do? Who did you see? What did you eat for lunch? Did you miss me? My introverted husband put up with that for about a week before he sat me down and told me I needed to find some way to have some human interaction during the day.

Whoopsie #2.

The ability to spend all of my time running my business and calling the shots in my own life on a daily basis is such a HUGE gift; please don’t mistake what I am saying in all of this. But it is hard. Like really hard. It takes discipline, eliminating distractions and a whole case burning candles, soy lattes and mellow music and sometimes it even means turning the wifi off, shutting my office door and focusing on the photos. For me, it meant creating a schedule for my day. It meant giving up the notion of walking Gunnar twice a day every day. It meant giving up the notion that being my own boss did not automatically make me a better wife, (dog)mom, cook, housekeeper or friend. (And there is a lot of relief in saying that statement out loud.)

I don’t have all of this figured out. And I don’t know that I ever will figure it out completely but over the last 12 months, I’ve learned that schedules, plans and boundaries actually are effective. And certainly help keep those emotional daggers at bay to give you the space and the freedom to run your business. There are still days where I greet Matt at the door with 20 questions and a serious need to be hugged but we are working on that. Still.

Arguably the most important part of this readiness triangle and also the hardest to talk about. Double whammy.

No matter your financial situation or management, preparation is your biggest weapon. Have an Emergency Fund. Plan for the slow season. Have a real knowledge of how much money you have to make every month to cover necessary bills. Plan for Health Insurance. Budget for your costs that will go up when you are working from home. Things like coffee. And electricity. And…toilet paper. (Truth.)

I truly believe this is the portion that is the hardest. I don’t say that to scare you but if it doesn’t, maybe it should. I somehow floundered through the emotional portion of the transition but the financial part was the biggest obstacle that I was ill-prepared to handle. (See day I spent $200 with $40 on just nail polish for reference.) Even though this was a topic that was covered ad nauseam in our household, the drastic shift in lifestyle change that I knew (and accepted and desperately wanted) had to happen was far harder to actually put into practice when it came down to it. It is a lovely thought to think that these things will just fall into place once you are doing something you love but the reality can be a lot more complicated.

This is why I say preparation is your biggest weapon. Those sacrifices you said would be no big deal to enforce? (Oh, hey J.Crew.) Why not actually DO THOSE THINGS before you are in a position where you have to. Save the money you would normally spend on your daily latte from Starbucks and put it in your Emergency Fund for a month. See how this affects you emotionally. It’s possible that morning latte gives you a solid start to your day and without it you feel unproductive. You should know these things going into it. I had a bad habit of managing my stress with a trip to (insert any retail store ever); this was something I thought would just go away once I was pursuing my passion 24/7 (go ahead, you can laugh at me) and when it didn’t, I had to find other ways to manage stress. It seems SO small but we build habits like these without realizing we are doing it and 5+ years of this habit (in my case) made it one difficult habit to break.

Listen, I’m not an expert on this area but this guy is. You can ignore everything I’ve said on this post but don’t discount the experts. I’m not here to tell you how to handle your finances but there is no creativity killer like stress and financial stress is up there with the worst kind of stress out there. So plan. And execute before you have to. And make sure you budget for toilet paper.

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It came and went without much fanfare but two Saturdays ago marked one year since I left my full-time corporate job. And while I still feel akin to a beginner on this whole be-my-own-boss thing, I’ve certainly learned a few things but there are also approximately one million things I would do differently. What I actually have figured out is that this isn’t an exact science. You may already have things figured out. You may not. You might have already given your notice without any of these points in place or you may have had the points in place for years but are having trouble finding the courage to make the leap.

I can’t tell you what to do; the timing is different for everyone but what I can tell you is that this was the best decision I have ever made for myself, my family, my business and quite frankly, my sanity. It has not been without roadblocks and the occasional detour but even in the darkest of nights, this is still the only path for me.

Don’t discount making efforts to prepare (in fact, DO MAKE CONSIDERABLE EFFORTS), but follow your gut. Don’t let fear control this decision. And always, always, always, serve your clients to the best of your abilities. (Even if this means editing with High School Musical in the background. They will never know. Unless you tell them on your blog. Like right now.)

Whoopsie #3.

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If there are any questions you would like answered, feel free to email me at melissa@melissaoholendt.com anytime. Night or day. Day or night.

We celebrated an engagement of two of our own at the weekly Sunday night family dinner. (Eeeeee!) I finally broke in my wear-to-shoot-wedding shoes and now can sleep, run, walk, bend, do cartwheels in the pair. I succumbed to the (brilliant) marketing tactics of Charles & Charles Rosé. (And think you should too because it’s fab.) I was made a believer in food trucks by the amazingness that is Hola Arepa. I caught Gunnar red-headed with the peanut butter jar. He pretended not to notice. I photographed the second (goooooorgeous) wedding of this season! I kept my weekly Monday date with this one and the Bachelorette. I maintained my title as the best wife ever and picked up puppy dog tails from here for that husband I love.

If you would like to follow me on Instagram, search for “melissaoholendt“. I would love to connect!

You know when you first meet a client and it’s like that scene in Sleepless in Seattle where Annie travels to Seattle and first sees Sam & Jonah on the beach? It’s clear that she makes this giant realization as she watches them together; without anyone telling her, she just knows that this is the man she wrote the impulsive meet-me-at-the-top-of-the-Empire-State-Building letter to and more importantly, the person who’s life she wants to be a part of.

THAT is how I feel about Kelly & Pat. (Though probably sans the Empire State Building / star-crossed lovers / little boy / radio talk show thing?) They are just people you want to be around. They are hilarious. They are intelligent. They are sarcastic. They are SO in love. They are sweet. They are movie start gorgeous. And really, you should hate them for all these things but you can’t because they are two of the most genuine and fun people to be around.

Kelly & Pat, thank you for inviting me into your lives – even just for an evening. I will never look at a stick again without thinking of you guys. xo

I dropped my husband off at the airport bright and early Friday morning to go surprise his momma in Colorado for Mother’s Day. And then spent three solid days only taking photos of Gunnar. (Literally.) I visited my letterpress loves at Lunalux. (Go! Buy! Fall in love!) I painted my nails. More than once. #polishaddictsanonymous I spent a gorgeous night on the patio of Bar Lurcat with a fabulous June couple. I spent a rowdy Friday night at home with my hard drive and a package of Sour Patch Kids. Welcome to Wedding Season 2012. I shot three (amazing!) sessions and painted my living room over the weekend; and proceeded to nearly cry while blow drying my hair Monday morning. I loved on my favorite little man. (For once, I don’t mean Gunnar.) I fell in love with Minneapolis all over again during a night on the patio with a glass of wine and the husband. The Bachelorette premiered! And yes that warranted an exclamation point. This week was jam-packed but it certainly was amazing. 

If you want to follow me on Instagram, search for “melissaoholendt“. I’d love to connect on there!

I kicked off the 2012 wedding season with a stunner of a wedding. And then cried while trying to blow dry my hair the next morning. (Wedding muscles say what?) My parents were the guests of honor at our Sunday night family dinner. Gunnar did some napping. It rained. HOLY MOLY, IT RAINED. (And I accidentally left the window of my office open. Whoopsie.) I bought one of these and drank my weight in lattes. I took a day off. (Yep. You read that right.) I wore stripes. And glitter. (No photos.) I  said goodbye to my parents after a perfect visit. I exposed Gunnar’s contortionist abilities. I shared wine, laughs and updates with one of my favorite 2011 couples. I flew a kite. (Well. Not technically. But I did gift someone a kite.) I ironed. By myself. And successfully.

If you want to follow me on Instagram, search for “melissaoholendt“. I’d love to connect on there!

“….But…what shoes are you going to wear?”

Those were the first words out of Matt’s mouth when I told him I was going to photograph a working farm. And, ok. I know I am not the first person you think of when you think “farm photographer”. In fact, I’m probably not even in your top ten. (Maybe my name would appear at the bottom of your top 100 list?) But this J.Crew loving, bracelet party, city girl has a growing adoration and sensitivity for locally sourced food and a huge, massive, tender heart for the treatment of animals.

The idea of conscious eating is something that is important to me. What we fuel our bodies with matters. My goal here is not to get political, but to offer awareness of farms within our area who are doing great things and making amazing strides to give our community the ability to make choices on where we source our food from. This is me, finally doing more than just talking about it.

Sunshine Harvest Farm is a small family farm dedicated to raising grass-fed beef, lamb, pork, chickens and eggs without the hormones, antibiotics or animal by-products that have become commonplace in our society. I can tell you from what I saw with my own eyes, Sunshine goes to great lengths to take phenomenal care of their animals and as someone who is a touch…sensitive to these matters, it makes a world of difference to know that these beautiful animals are being raised by humans who care about their health and happiness. If you are looking for 1/2 or full share meat CSA options, I encourage you to contact Sunshine Harvest Farm or go visit them at the following Farmers Markets:

Mill City Farmers Market (Saturdays)
Fulton Farmers Market (Saturdays)
Kingfield Farmers Market (Sundays)

Also, Sunshine’s eggs are the best I’ve ever tasted. Ever. Go pick up a dozen and thank me later. #farmfreshFTW

(And for the record, the answer to the question from the husband is obviously hot pink wellies. Duh.)

These two are certainly not strangers to the Melissa Oholendt Photography blog but this makes baby Slone’s first kind-of/sort-of/you-should-let-it-slide appearance and, considering she made her beautiful grand entrance to the world on January 21 of this year, hopefully not her last. (Photographer hinting at a 6 month session says what? What.)

Love you guys. xo

Oh, hey look, the dog slept. May arrived. I managed to convince – coerce? – Matt into thinking a cowhide rug would be the perfect addition to our family room. (Success.) It rained. Oh my goodness, did it rain. I discovered I own enough bracelets to wear one a day for two months straight and never repeat. (Also, I joined Bracelets Anonymous at the insistence of Matt.) I visited my hair bestie at Juut Salon Gaviidae. I cleaned, organized and errand ran in preparation for my parents coming into town (last night!). I dropped far, far too many things this week, including a bag of very full groceries and a wine bottle on my foot. (The wine bottle survived in case you were wondering.) I session planned with clients at my very favorite wine bar. I (we) made a Chipotle run at 9pm on a Sunday. I declared egg, salsa & avocado as my newest favorite addition. (Even surpassing bracelets.)

Let’s get this thing started Wedding Season.

If you want to follow me on Instagram, search for “melissaoholendt“. I’d love to connect on there!